Tuesday, July 24, 2012

My Heart Aches

Tonight, I write this post in tears. We got some bad news today when we met with Dr. A. The results from my mom's CT scan came back and shows that the chemo treatment isn't working. In fact, the tumors increased in size and the cancer seems to be spreading in the chest. The EOX treatment was the first line treatment to battle this. Dr. A will call me tomorrow to go over possible second line treatments and change things up. He wanted to make some calls and do more research.  As it stands now, if this new regime doesn't work or she chooses to stop treatment, she's got a few months left. My heart ached as I saw my mom break down when she heard today's news. I am so frustrated and tired of beating kicked repeatedly when I am already down. It was hoping for a bit of good news for once. Why is this happening? Why must my mom suffer?


  1. Sometimes it's hard to face things you have no control over and have the courage to continue. Over the years Aunty Rita, you and Mandy have demonstrated courage and strength I can only hope and pray for. You guys inspire me. I continue to pray for a blessing for Aunty Rita and growing up with you guys as friends and family helped shape the person I am today. I can only hope to do the same for you….Love Sabrina

    P.S. Love the family pics…everyone look so lovely…oxoxoxox

  2. Lorita,
    I am so sorry. You might also want to look into Rational Theraputics or other company that can test the tissue sample against other chemo drugs. It's not standard and is not covered by insurance, but may provide insight of chemo options.

    It is so heart breaking watching your loved one in pain, discouraged, or depressed. I want to share a story that my supervisor told me. She had a daughter who was diagnosed with cancer when she was around 8 or 9. Her name was Emily. My boss told me about how they had to take in a good amount of bad news over the years. Her and her husband let themselves cry and experience all the sadness they felt, and then the next day, refocused and tried to just experience the present and the time they had with their daughter. This was especially important being that her daughter was so young and they needed to be strong for her.

    SO let yourself cry and let your mom grieve. And just remember tomorrow is a new day and no one knows what it will bring. It's so hard though, especially symptoms that prevent someone from just living and going out without getting winded or tired or nauseous or in pain. But I am hoping for better days ahead. Sending you, your mom, and family lots of love and prayers.

  3. I'm so so sorry Lorita!!! I just can't imaging how you feel!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your Mom, with all of you!!! A big and sincere hug to you!!!

  4. Hi Lorita, I am so sorry and saddened to hear this! I still have faith that your mom is going to beat this. She is a very strong woman and with the love of her family and God; this cancer will not win. My thoughts and prayers are with her and the rest of you. I miss her warm smile at work. Please tell her hello and that I have not forgotten her. I know it's hard to watch your parent or anyone you love go through something like this. I wish you all well and your mom a speedy recovery. Stay strong.


    1. Thank you Marisa. We are hanging in there.

  5. I'm so sorry Lorita. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.

    Jen & Nate