Friday, January 25, 2013

Conversations with My Mother



Several weeks back I received a book from a dear friend whom I've never actually met in person. It was a book called Conversations with My Mother. I "met" my friend through an online stomach cancer support group when mom initially got diagnosed last year. We had a lot in common. Both our moms were terminally ill with this disease, we were the primary caregivers, we both educated ourselves on everything we could get our hands on and we both pushed to make it to the next day. We cherished the good moments and endured the bad moments in our journeys with our moms. End of last year, her mom passed away. I remember crying when she sent me the message of the news.

So, fast forward to a few weeks ago. It was the night I had just come home from leaving mom at that crappy good for nothing rehab facility. I was so distraught, unsettled and felt so alone. I came home and my husband just gave me a big hug and I cried on his shoulder. He mentioned that I had received a package. In it was some pretty darn cute baby clothes and the Conversations with My Mother book. I was so deeply touched by all this. It was like there was someone out there that just understood every aspect of this journey...and that meant a great deal.

The book itself is essentially a guided keepsake journal. It has questions for you to ask your mother about her upbringing, her feelings and life experiences, her likes/dislikes etc. Last night I started going through the book with mom. I asked her questions, we talked, we laughed and I documented the memories that were unfolding before me. There were things I never knew about and it made me really cherish this time I have with her and share whatever time she has left. It inspired me to hear about the amazing women that came before me...my great grandmother, my grandmother and now my mother. All very strong women who worked hard in life and loved their children so deeply.

I really thank my friend for sending this book to me. She's given me a gift that will transcend time.

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